Reviewed by:Â Dr. Robert Menardi, DVM
Our dogs are very clever at figuring out how to get our attention and communicate with us. They might whine by the door when they need to go out, nudge their empty food bowl when they are hungry, or push up against us with their head, paw, or whole body. They know that giving us those big puppy dog eyes will usually result in an extra cookie or some more tummy rubs. While some of these behaviors are obvious, and we can easily figure out what message our pups are sending, some are a little more mysterious, and we need to take into account all that is happening in order to see the cause of the dog’s behavior.
One of the most effective ways our dogs can communicate with us is by giving us their paw. It is hard to ignore this behavior, as anyone who has tried to read a book or newspaper or to work on a computer while their dog is repeatedly giving their paw can vouch for. Understanding what is behind this action will help you to know if it’s just an expression of love and feeling comfortable, a sign that there is an injury to be looked at, or they really need to go out and do business.
Table of Contents:
- What is Manding?
- Reasons They Might Give You a Paw
- When Does Pawing Become a Problem?
- The Bottom Line
What is Manding?
When your dog gives you their paw, it is an example of them expressing a need or a desire and hoping that you will meet it. All dogs are born knowing how to request what they need. Puppies instinctively paw at their mothers for milk. To describe this behavior, animal behaviorists borrowed the term manding from practitioners who work with non-verbal autistic children. A mand is a request for something. It can be a physical need like having to go out to potty, being hungry, or being thirsty. It can also be a request for a social need like affection, play, or comforting touch. Being aware of a dog’s mands allows the caregiver to respond to what is wanted before other, possibly negative behaviors are used. The belief is that it is as important, if not more so, for the dog’s needs to be acknowledged and for them to know they are being heard than to always get the thing they want. Theoretically, this leads to a minimization of undesired behaviors as the dog realizes they are being heard in their communication to you and not just responding to your commands. The behaviors that you respond to will be reinforced and repeated. If your dog sits by the door and you let them out, that is a mand. If they give you their paw and you pet them, that is a mand. It is different than rewarding a dog for performing a behavior (i.e., giving a command ‘sit’ and then rewarding them for doing it). Some trainers view this as a positive contrast to a ‘nothing is free mentality’ that says our dogs should work for everything they get.
As we begin to recognize our dog’s mands, we can see what needs must be met right away and what we will choose not to follow up on. Deciphering the context of a dog giving you their paw is the most important way to understand what message they are trying to communicate to us.
Reasons They Might Give You a Paw
- To show affection: In the same way we reach out and pat our favorite fur friends to show them how much we love them, our dogs often return the favor by gently extending a paw and making contact with us.
- They want your attention: Dogs quickly learn that a behavior like pawing gets a quick response; it is often the behavior that finally gets action. Because it gets reinforced with your response, even if you respond negatively to try to get them to stop, dogs will keep using it. If this becomes a problem behavior, trying to recognize what your dog is communicating before they paw you can alleviate it. If they come and stare at you, they might want to play; if they head to the door, it could be a need to go out; are they headed to the food bowl? Time for a meal. Seeing and reacting to the behavior that comes before they resort to pawing will help to eliminate the pawing.
- They are anxious: Sometimes when your pup is feeling stress, they will paw you for reassurance and to ask for your help. These usually are paired with other body language that signals distress such as lip licking, ears tucked back flat, or yawning.
- They have a physical need: Dogs will often paw you when they really need your attention to let you know they need to go out and do business or that they are hungry or thirsty and their internal stomach clock is going off.
- There is something wrong with that paw: A dog with an injury to their paw might offer it to you looking for help. They might have a cracked footpad, a broken toenail, or have something stuck between their toes. If your dog presents their paw, especially if it is accompanied by whining or limping, take a close look for any obvious injuries.
When Does Pawing Become a Problem?
Many times, we see our dog offering a paw as their way of giving a gentle outreach and another sign of our close bonds of affection or a reasonable way for them to communicate a need. There are instances, however, when this behavior can be troublesome, and it becomes necessary to limit it. If your dog paws too frequently, and it becomes a nuisance behavior that makes it impossible for you to sit still without having your arms and legs covered in scratches, you will need to retrain them to get your attention in another, less intrusive way.
Putting a paw on you can also be a show of dominance from your dog. It can be their way of claiming you as their property. In these cases, pawing could be accompanied by other behaviors such as body blocking and resource guarding.
Any response to the pawing will reinforce it as a successful method of getting your attention, so you will need to either pick up on their earlier cues that they have a want or a need and address it before they resort to pawing, or you will have to reward another behavior, such as sitting quietly. If you stop responding to the pawing and start offering praise and rewarding quiet sitting, you can work to lengthen the time that they sit before your respond to them.
The Bottom Line:
Among the many ways our dogs communicate with us, giving us a paw can be the sweetest and clearest sign of their affection. In addition to showing us they are comfortable and confident in our presence, dogs also use their paws as an effective way to get our attention and alert us to some of their various needs and wants. Being aware that pawing can mean a range of things can help ensure that our dogs feel they are being heard and will not resort to other more destructive behaviors to get our attention. This can allow us to nip any negative uses of pawing in the bud before they become a painful annoyance.
Knowing what your pup is ‘saying’ when they put their paw on you is just another way of demonstrating the close bond we can have with our fur family.
Sources:
https://www.akc.org/expert-advice/advice/why-does-my-dog-put-his-paw-on-me/
https://www.southernliving.com/culture/pets/why-do-dogs-put-their-paws-on-you
https://www.petmd.com/dog/behavior/why-do-dogs-put-their-paws-on-people
https://a-z-animals.com/blog/if-your-dog-keeps-putting-their-paw-on-you-this-is-why/
